Who are you? That was one of the questions that I received during one of my interviews. It was the one question that stumped me. I couldn’t even come up with a BS answer. I preceded to tell him that I was a recent grad and that’s when he stopped me. He said “No, I’m not asking what you do. I’m asking who you are.” I had no idea how to answer that. I’ve been in school most of my life and I had no idea who I was outside of school. Even when I was working, I looked at myself as a student. Between all the college transfers and changes in majors it just became a huge part of me. It took me awhile before I got my bachelor’s and over two years to get my Masters. Once I finished, I didn’t know who I was anymore. I’m just so used to being in school and being a student. The feeling of not having schoolwork felt odd. I got so lost in the rollercoaster of college I no longer recognized who I was outside of it. After that interview I pondered that question, so I could have an answer for next time. I couldn’t come up with anything. What has become of my life? Was I just this walking zombie whose life mission was to finish school, and now that I did, I was left a complete mess. I thought finishing school would be the answer to my problems, but my problems escalated once a big piece of who I was disappeared. The student title was no longer there, and my identity went into question. I started to really think about me and who I use to be. After thinking about this for months I realized who I was.
Who am I? I can honestly say I am this caring, kind-hearted, vibrant, indecisive, complex, versatile, awkward, whimsical, slightly competitive, weird, goofy, socially introverted person who can’t be forced into a box. I was always that girl with a thousand dreams. I always wanted to do multiple things, and I didn’t have one passion that was bigger than the rest. I didn’t have a direct career path I just knew that I wanted to be happy and free. Whatever it is that I end up doing I just want to have a sense of freedom, like a world traveler or something. I’m a person who likes to laugh, act silly and get lost in creativity. I can get impulsive with my ideas and go at it 1000% but that fire easily fades, mainly because of my doubts and fears. I’m also an anxious person who’s filled with anxiety and worries a lot. I feel like I’m all over the place and I’m not sure where I will finally land. I can’t be defined. I’m too complex for that, but maybe that’s what makes me interesting. My life is like a story where the main character is just a complete mess who can’t seem to get her footing in the world, but you want to see where she finally lands and if she gets herself together. Follow my journey to see where I land. It’s going to be an interesting ride. 😉
